Cracking..

2 more days to that "grand" event, so the tension being put on also "grand"..Emotional control also in bad situation, so yesterday night a line is crossed..It's not that I want to fingerpoint or what..It's just that, I mean, everyone is in tense mood, bad mood (mainly cause by lack of sleep). So, don't just shout at people, though familiar with the temper and attitude but sometimes not evry moment every second people can endure. Sometimes I think word is better than speak, if tell, surely will go into a fight and I complain to everyone around me because if I straight tell surely will come to a fight. Don't push me to the limit. My limit is not far yet not near so...
I'm 100% sure that I wont enter MAK if given chance in the future. So torturing. Even crew also feels like that, how about the leaders??But still, human is selfish. In some circumstances they just can't care for everyone. People do want to complain, throw tantrums etc. I mean if true friends, they surely will definitely understand. Anyway, I think it's my own problem, when I mix with certain people, I don't feel like it used to be. Is it something has changed? Is it me who've changed or is it I'm being hated, being thought very troublesome?? I can't help but keep thinking that. Why Taurus must have this as one of the qualities? Why cant I be exception from that general Taurusian?
Now, I just want to finish my assignments and catch up my studies.I really wanted piano very much. Part of me hanging on the cliff of "give up", part of me floating through clouds, vivid yet vague..following the wind....

Talk about the past...

I forgot to mention a few of the interesting activities in college for last few weeks. Firstly, there was this ponggal, actually it was not meant to participate intentionally as I know nothing about it. I came back from lecture and see all the funny pots beside so under the curiosity, I've joined that activity.

And it turned out to be challeging yet enjoyable. It ended up..not quite successful but still..memorable. First time taking part in acitivity related to other culture and...well, not bad..Next, MAK is around the corner, I wore Punjabi suit to attend that event as the theme of the event was middleeast so we have to wear traditional clothes.

On Valentine's day, while everyone is lovey doveying..I woke up at 12pm (can guess whether I'm related to this "day".On that night, I went to Indian dance show before joining friends gathering which is organized by C n S. It happens to be..em..kinda bored but overall still okay..Then, we dismiss at 2am. So, though all the busy'ness', still manage to gets some fun from it thankfully. Looking forward when I know how to play piano nicely.

BIG decision

I have come to make an important decision. I've struggled for a whole week to make this decision. I'd decided to quit quan zhong hua. For the past few days, I was covered with guilt, responsibility, tension, all the whatsoever negative aura seems to dance around me.Maybe it's because all the MAK, PTH, Actual and bla bla bla...just..just seems too much..way too much for shoulders to support the weight. For me, my passion is towards piano, and I got a golden opportunity as my roommate knows, S knows, K knows and they are willing to teach me. I should be thankful and must practice hard.

But, things doesn't go the way we wanted. All the assignments that are coming nonstop seems to take away all my time. Now, it's always wake up, class, lunch, class, assignments, class, meeting, activities, sleep and repeat. Now that I feel relax that I've decided to quit it.

Whirlpool..

Swoosh..swoosh..air!!air!!I need some air..not that I'm greedy..I'm stucked!!I'm caught in a whirlpool..who can save me??!!anybody?anyone?all the things are hitting me..even sand, a small thingy in that whirlpool didn't bother to spare me from hitting.."it's just a small whirlpool",someone told me..I recall back..no feelings, always felt something pressed on my chest, barely give me chance to relax.Am I really happy in front of people?Am I?I don't know..don't want to know..A small part of me said, "aren't you're the one who doesn't want to let go??who to blame for your own greediness??who to blame that you felt guilty for your own speech?"when is it going to end?whirling..whirling..swoosh..swoosh..endless whirling........
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New Year has GONE~

Cant imagine how fast time passes, feels like just went home yesterday..I don't want to face the fact that uni has restarted again..Though during CNY there's something happened, dunno whether was my fault or his..always neglect me..only can see him once in a blue moon but still no communication.I mean, at least update what had happened to each other during the year..but, him? NEVER..Till that very last day which he left, something broke..the moment till he left, never look back..That's it..Guess that's where the description of broken glass came in, once broken, everything changes..I don't know how he thinks, but I..I..*sigh*

Back to the story, LOST..new year-GONE, homework-LOST..lots to catch up..inflection, compounding,etc..research paper, apk, titas..OMG!!hopefully I can survive through this semester as this is just merely the beginning of the "bright" future..Aza aza hwaiting~